tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6480511620442233365.post6065931540252818403..comments2023-07-29T03:55:03.592-05:00Comments on Classic Brian: Urushiol, my loveClassic Brianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11045568318901346184noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6480511620442233365.post-51902199935181188262012-05-21T01:01:28.981-05:002012-05-21T01:01:28.981-05:00This post is utter bullshit. Poison ivy is the stu...This post is utter bullshit. Poison ivy is the stupidest fucking thing in the world and causes me to contemplate whether God doesn't exist or does exist and is just a HUGE asshole. A week of playing Grand Theft Auto Vice City was once totally ruined by a urushiol-soaked paper towel on my left-lower back. No more are you afforded moments of free thought; you merely ponder the itch. To go at it or to not? Yeah, you can scratch and burn and, oh, I did like to smack it. I would smack the poison ivy — I guess I was kinky — and yell at it and stare at it with contempt. But it will merely smirk back, and slowly pull another region of epidermis above level, red and yearning. Hot showers, I thought, would punish the ivy, scald it with liquid heat; overload it with satiation. But no, what would conventionally cause me to yelp with pain now just provided a cackling satisfaction. I couldn't hurt the ivy, all my attempts simply pleasured it. My hatred was misguided, as is your fierce love. Only apathy can absolve it. Like a lost love, you must force indifference to alleviate the insatiable want. I've wanted to cut the ivy, but it would take this plain display of hatred as an invitation to burgeon. Fuck you, you fucking poison ivy, you don't fucking get it you fucked-up fucking pain in the ass. Or the legs. Whatever. I'll never forgive you. And if you show up at my door poison ivy, well I may fucking off myself because to let you invade me as I did before would merely be a slower, more painful, more defeating form of suicide. May you burn in hell, poison ivy. Lord knows it would please you so.<br /><br />-EClassic Brianhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11045568318901346184noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6480511620442233365.post-52289928586311742462012-05-20T19:36:47.744-05:002012-05-20T19:36:47.744-05:00I like this post. It makes me think of Conor's...I like this post. It makes me think of Conor's legs.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11734737844604951690noreply@blogger.com