There's always this

Always, no matter what time it is. I can detach myself from whatever life is currently throwing at me and write.

Writing is so much of things these days, it seems. I've been writing a paper for history for the last forever and I'm writing a blog post.

Again, here I am, trying to think of ways to evoke thought.

The main thing I've taken away from blogging is that, if you aren't into it, you're fucking the dog. Because, if you are to just come to the threshold and throw your thoughts on the page, what value do you expect from them?

It's like freestyle rap. If it rhymes, it's proficient. But writing doesn't pass in the same way a freestyle rap does. Writing is there and is supposed to be substantial and not a mere vomiting of thoughts that aren't thought about.

What I am saying is that, I can't honestly write about something and put it on you to care (I know I say this like, every other week and I'm sorry but) because I'm not even thinking about it. I'm just ... thinking it. So, if I don't think about what I write about, how can I expect you to think about what I write about?

I just want a reaction, on a good day. A sign of approval or a deference of interest. But I feel like today, on days like today, you read it, think "okay" and go about your business.

And that's my fault. Because I want to be someone who can make you remember a piece of writing, not someone who gives you shit that goes in one eye and out the other (I'm just gonna pretend that works).

Maybe that's what defines a great writer. He thinks about what he's writing as he's writing it, he doesn't just think it. The thought behind it comes naturally. It's as if he's double-thinking. Because if you can step up and just write something that evokes thought on behalf of it being well thought out, it's like your words — one written is worth two read. Hope that makes sense.

I'm a busy busy dude. Especially on Wednesdays. I may be dropping one of my classes, though. Being assistant sports editor at the DI is killing my academics. I have no daytime procrastination. So that turns into nighttime procrastination. So homework goes to the beach.

Priority list:
1. Daily Illini
2. Socialization
3. Procrastination
4. Homework
5. Food
6. Appearance
7. Classic Brian
8. Sleep
9. This class I was talking about earlier

Why is DI my number one priority? I don't know, what else is it gonna be? I enjoy the job, and it's something I have to do. If I do neglect it, I fuck some nice people over. Which isn't what I'm going for.

God, I have to do
16. My tax returns
17. This paper I'm working on
but once I'm done with that, I'm like, done for the week. Which is nice. Because this weekend I'm going to Joplin, MO for a mission trip. I probably shouldn't be dead tired the whole time so maybe it's time I get back to work.

Good night, my beloved Classic Brian
23. family

--Eliot Sill