Nick - Justits

Hey, remember when Mada asked us to write about being a girl? Is that offer still standing?

The reason I write this post is because earlier I saw a girl on facebook whose profile picture is just a picture of her tits. And I thought to myself, if I were a girl, would my facebook picture be a picture of my tits? I don't think so, but I really don't know.

Here, wait, let me demonstrate. My lovely assistant Justice Ruth Ginsburg will be assisting in the demonstration.

Before

After

Thanks, Ruth.

Anyway, I'm really glad I'm not a girl.

Well, see you next week!

-Nick.

Robert - HANNAH I'M GOING TO KILL YOU

You'll be green with envy. And Packer cleats.

MY GIRLFRIEND HANNAH TOLD ME THAT I SHOULD BE MORE COMPETITIVE ABOUT SPORTS BECAUSE THAT MAKES THEM MORE FUN. OKAY. The Packers play the Bears today in 18 minutes. Hannah's a rabid Bears fan. I'm a fairweather Packers fan. But I'm competitive! I'm willing to bet a lot that my Packers will stomp Brian Urlacher and whoever still plays for that team. MY PROPOSAL: Whoever's team loses today is the other person's official bitch until spring break. Publicly. Everyone will know. It will be so totally humiliating.

Hannah Kolkmeier, if you have any confidence or faith or true care for your team, accept this bet in the public forum, either on Classic Brian or on Facebook.

I will be liveblogging as the game develops to describe how it makes the destiny of my soul feel. Keep refreshing, please.

THIS ONE'S FOR THE MEN.