Sunday, November 20, 2011

Robert - Springfield: A Tempting Demon

A Day in the Life of Robert in Columbia, MO:

1. I arise promptly at 8:00 am. I cleanse myself, perhaps shave, and begin my day confidently.
2. I attend my classes. My posture is excellent, my brain activity moving at rapid speeds.
3. I go to work, and I provide society with the invaluable service of taking up that spot on that couch at Defoe-Graham.
4. Perhaps I visit a professor in office hours, perhaps I take care of some paperwork, perhaps I mail a letter, perhaps I attend a meeting.
5. I find a nice tree and do some reading in the waning sun. Perhaps some Thoreau, if I'm feeling up to it.
6. I eat dinner, food in my mouth and books in my eyes.
7. I begin my studies for the night, returning home and finally reading that page of that political science book that I meant to be the beginning of a 20-page reading session.
8. I reestablish verbal or visual communications with my significant other.
9. I remove the greater part of my clothes and rest for the new day to come.

A Day in the Life of Robert in Springfield, IL:

1. Wake the fuck up at 11 or something.
2. Get the fuck up at 11:30. Eat cereal. Provided there's milk.
3. Begin clingy love affair with the internet.
4. Watch something on TV I wouldn't ever be watching. Like sports. Maybe the Bears. Who's one player on the Bears? I don't know. Another reason to watch them.
5. Lose 25 Wii points for my Mii character in Wii Tennis.
6. Begin typing email. Reestablish love affair with internet.
7. Play Wii Mario Kart, as long as it is necessary.
8. Eat a chicken patty.
9. Wii Mario Kart.
10. Wonder why it's dark out already at 6:00 pm.
11. Text friends. 'Sup.

But seriously guys, 'sup. Let me know what's going on or I'm going right back to Mario Kart. I'm serious.

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